The Confidence Project - Dr Rob Yeung

It is a great read. Very realistic, filled with a lot of real-life examples and backed by intense research.

The author goes through the book in a sequential order, starting from explaining various grades and types of confidence, tests to analyze an individual’s confidence level and the tools to be more confident.

Through this book, psychologist Dr Rob Yeung offers proven tools that one needs to plan and achieve their personal growth, happiness and success.

Some of my favourite concepts from the book are:

• Curse of Confidence: Dr Rob argues that the ideal level of confidence is between 6-7 (out of 10). More self-belief can be harmful and results in losing friendships. Moreover, he says that self-doubt or self-questioning are constructive and lead to success.

• Reappraisal Technique: A way of interpreting feelings in a less distressing fashion. Basically, awareness that an elevated heart rate, faster breathing and other physical symptoms of stress are not harmful. Rather, the body’s response to stress has evolved to help us successfully tackle challenges and ordeals; this physiological arousal is designed to help us cope better.

• Spontaneous Trait Transference: This means that if we hear an individual describing someone else in a certain way, we often end up ascribing those characteristics to the individual, too. This holds true for both positive and negative traits. Dr Rob suggests that one must speak about others the way they want to be perceived by others, especially when we talk about others’ behaviours.

• Some of the other techniques & concepts are mindful acceptance (accepting the current situation as it is rather than wishing you could change the past), identifying the confidence gaps (specific exercise to understand what’s bothering you and to help yourself solve it), weighing the alternatives and taking action.